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jadefalcon1
user #21137
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to niroe in message #479:
...and people ask why I don't want children.

Good luck with him. Boys are hell when they discover fire. I know I was :)

~Jade Falcon
[mail][blog][page]
Obsessive, venomous, vitriolic, occasionally brilliant and mostly overblown.
message 481/505 2008-07-25 11:34:39 [save my place] [reply]
mq
user #70145
1319 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to jadefalcon1 in message #481:
at least with raising boys you only have to worry about one dick.

drink rum, ski off cliffs
message 482/505 2008-07-25 21:36:05 [save my place] [reply]
jadefalcon1
user #21137
5471 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to mq in message #482:
Unless he's gay. :)

~Jade Falcon
[mail][blog][page]
Obsessive, venomous, vitriolic, occasionally brilliant and mostly overblown.
message 483/505 2008-07-26 01:22:00 [save my place] [reply]
niroe
user #1859
3235 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to basementcat in message #480:
Seriously. I often wonder why I didn't just stick with pets.

[ niroe ]
message 484/505 2008-07-31 19:24:02 [save my place] [reply]
niroe
user #1859
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to jadefalcon1 in message #481:
If it weren't for the "cute moments," the rest of the attributes of parenthood would have rendered our species extinct long ago.

[ niroe ]
message 485/505 2008-07-31 19:26:33 [save my place] [reply]
chuckster
user #19267
354 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to niroe in message #485:
According to a reliable source, "You should raise children in oak barrels... feeding them through the hole. When they turn fourteen,,, plug the hole."

And yes, if it wasn't for a mother's self-deception, we would all have been drowned at birth. Let us pray!

message 486/505 2008-07-31 19:49:28 [save my place] [reply]
niroe
user #1859
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to chuckster in message #486:
Ha. Fourteen. I'm thinkin' six.

Everything was fine when we got home tonight. We ate dinner, he watched some Nickelodeon, and the world was good. In the half hour or so since I left the last post here, he had a melt down over a random exclamation for mac & cheese with a subsequent mommy-denial, he was sent to his room, he peed on his bed in spite, and he lost all swimming, chocolate milk, and mac & cheese priviledges for the rest of his life while I stripped his bed, cursing and describing how I'll go about selling his Lightning McQueen racecar bed to a boy who deserves it.

Now he's back to watching Spongebob and he's acting like a perfect gentleman, even using the potty, by himself, like a big boy (can't believe anything was left in him).

Everyone says the two's are terrible. The three's are far worse. It's like the fucking Twilight Zone. And being 31 weeks pregnant, I'm not for all the physical nonesense, I can't pick him up, and I'm probably far crabbier than normal.

He's still for sale and now he comes with a free racecar bed.

[ niroe ]
message 487/505 2008-07-31 20:34:39 [save my place] [reply]
homeslice
user #9142
5780 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to niroe in message #487:
Hahah. Worst ours does is puke a little on the carpet.



Even my henchmen think I'm crazy.
message 488/505 2008-07-31 22:25:51 [save my place] [reply]
mq
user #70145
1319 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to homeslice in message #488:
thank you for reminding me why i am almost thirty and still have yet to procreate.


drink rum, ski off cliffs
message 489/505 2008-08-01 07:51:38 [save my place] [reply]
homeslice
user #9142
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to mq in message #489:
Ours are cats. Not children.

We're not fucking stupid :)



Even my henchmen think I'm crazy.
message 490/505 2008-08-01 08:30:07 [save my place] [reply]
chuckster
user #19267
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to niroe in message #487:
Well first of all, it sounds like you are letting him run free outside of his barrel... lol. But if it is any consolation to you, "Yes, there are the terrible twos... not much is said about the threes, terrible, terrific, or transitional, but on the bright side you should be able to look forward to the Fabulous Fours. If you can hold on to him for that long, nurturing as needed, you'll be able to get a far better price.

Oh, by the way, per that 31 weeks thing; have you figured out what is causing that? Just in case you don't know, there are magical rocks out there that if you get too close to, will make you swell... Yeah, really.


[doting oldster]

message 491/505 2008-08-01 15:48:59 [save my place] [reply]
niroe
user #1859
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to chuckster in message #491:
I need to get a barrel. That's a bit of wisdom I had to acquire here. Luckily, he's been back on an even keel this week. I'll be sure to keep in mind that older = $$ in the mean time.

Since we did this whole procreation thing on purpose and our plans are almost fully to fruition (no matter how jaded the 3rd trimester can make a woman), I'm fairly sure the magical rocks are going to be surgically disconnected. Then it won't matter how close I get.

[ niroe ]
message 492/505 2008-08-05 21:27:03 [save my place] [reply]
chuckster
user #19267
354 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to niroe in message #492:
Red HotSpecial: Genuine Hand Crafted Oak Barrels. Large, medium, or small. Missing bung hole plugs. Must suppy your own.

http://www.usedwinebarrels.com/

This Barrel is approximately 38 inches tall. A Full barrel with Special Chestnut bandings.
Two Chestnut bands on each end adds a certain prestige and elegance to this wine barrel.

$100/ea + $65 s/h
For a Limited Time only...


Add a BURGANDY STAIN to the middle girth of this Wine Barrel for that rich style decor.

$125/ea + $65 s/h

Just trying to help.





message 493/505 2008-08-08 16:40:30 [save my place] [reply]
outzider
user #1
3101 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to chuckster in message #493:
huh huh bung hole huh huh middle girth huh huh

- oZ
the guy your mother knows as "your dad" [blog] [lj]
message 494/505 2008-08-08 20:46:26 [save my place] [reply]
basementcat
user #127382
114 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to outzider in message #494:
And when are you having kids, oZ?

---------
Non ex transverso sed deorsum.
message 495/505 2008-08-09 10:41:07 [save my place] [reply]
outzider
user #1
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to basementcat in message #495:
My wife already has one kid to take care of in the house. ;)

- oZ
the guy your mother knows as "your dad" [blog] [lj]
message 496/505 2008-08-09 11:05:40 [save my place] [reply]
homeslice
user #9142
5780 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to outzider in message #496:
And you can't get her pregnant going in the backdoor anyway.



Even my henchmen think I'm crazy.
message 497/505 2008-08-09 11:09:52 [save my place] [reply]
ironkitten82
user #16563
5566 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to homeslice in message #497:

Can, just a little more improbable, though


~ IronKit ~
Zeit. Ich brauche mehr Zeit.
message 498/505 2008-08-09 11:14:38 [save my place] [reply]
mq
user #70145
1319 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to ironkitten82 in message #498:
i agree, i heve met (and worked with) people that must have been anal births.




drink rum, ski off cliffs
message 499/505 2008-08-09 11:18:39 [save my place] [reply]
homeslice
user #9142
5780 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to mq in message #499:
Most of our usuals, actually.



Even my henchmen think I'm crazy.
message 500/505 2008-08-09 11:34:20 [save my place] [reply]
basementcat
user #127382
114 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to niroe in message #487:
I admire you. In all seriousness, I really do. I mean, I'm sure there must be upsides to being a parent since you haven't smothered him yet, but I would have a total breakdown.

No kids, ever. I'm actually on my local planned parenthood waiting list for a tubal.

---------
Non ex transverso sed deorsum.
message 501/505 2008-08-09 11:59:07 [save my place] [reply]
niroe
user #1859
3235 posts
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subject: re: For Sale
in reply to basementcat in message #501:
Thanks. Something outweighs the insanity, though I've yet to put my finger on it.

I've requested his equipment be disconnected. Fairly guaranteed prevention of any future lapses in judgement. I haven't had the baby yet and I've already started researching urologists on his behalf.

[ niroe ]
message 502/505 2008-08-12 20:58:01 [save my place] [reply]
cyco
user #27782
889 posts
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subject: laptop for sale.
I have a compaq laptop for sale. Dual core AMD 1.7's, 4 gigs of ram, 80 gig hdd, 15.4 wide screen clean no scratches, no dead pixsels. Its a good laptop in good shape. $500+ shipping Selling because I have a macbook I need to pay for.

cyco P B W C
message 503/505 2008-10-25 19:18:39 [save my place] [reply]
outzider
user #1
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subject: Gateway C-5815 for sale
That reminds me. This is available for $625, local pickup, or $15 additional for Priority Mail shipping.

I have a Gateway C-5815 Tablet PC available, in near-new condition, restored to factory condition and installation. This is part of Gateway's professional notebook series, so it isn't the 15.4" plastic Gateways that you generally see at Circuit City and the like. It's a sturdy, squeak-free case made of rubberized plastic and metal, and has all of the niceties you've come to expect. It also has a dual digitizer, which means the screen responds to both touch and pen, so you can navigate web pages with your finger, or use drawing applications with a pressure sensitive pen. The notebook also comes with an extended warranty, and Windows Vista Business Edition.

Pictures available upon request.

* Intel Core 2 Duo U7500 (low voltage) at 1.06 GHz (fast AND low power and low heat!)
* 12.1" WXGA (1280x800) LCD display
* Intel GMA950 graphics
* Wacom Penabled Dual Digitizer (Active/Passive digitizer)
* 2gb DDR2 RAM
* 120gb SATA 5400rpm Drive
* DVD+-RW/DL drive (Reads and writes DVDs, dual layer DVDs, and CDs)
* 4 in 1 memory card reader/writer, for SD, MMC, Memory Stick (and Pro)
* Built in Intel 3945 802.11a/b/g wireless (can swap in Broadcom card if desired)
* Gigabit Ethernet
* 56k Fax/Modem
* Built in stereo speakers and microphone
* 2 USB, 1 VGA, 1 FireWire, Audio In/Out, PC Card slot, one additional internal mini PCIe slot
* Built in fingerprint reader
* Comes with original box, battery, AC adapter, cleaning cloth, manuals, reinstallation disc, and an extended warranty that expires in October, 2010.
* Windows Vista Business with Tablet Components, Microsoft Works 8.5, a 90 day subscription to McAfee Security Suite, and DVD playing software. I'd be happy to install Firefox and Avast Virus scanner, as they're free and useful.


- oZ
the guy your mother knows as "your dad" [blog] [lj] [things i hate about you]
message 504/505 2008-10-26 09:38:34 [save my place] [reply]
gamebuster37
user #127676
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subject: re: Gateway C-5815 for sale
in reply to outzider in message #504:
Really wish I could get that but alas I am a young poor college student that is to far from home and is looking for gas money for the return trip. I do however have a couple computers and such that are lying around my room if my mom hasn't disposed of them yet that might be of some help to your site here.

message 505/505 2008-10-27 03:33:19 [save my place] [reply]

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